A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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Yo mama's so fat because she has a glandular disorder that makes her fat.

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

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you

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Walking.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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jacob mckeand sucks his own dick, lol jokes, he has jamie for that

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Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

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An Asian walks into a bar, but the bartender asks him to leave the bartender replies "we're closing soon" but he secretly harbored racist views that he had not yet come to terms with and was deeply ashamed of.

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out of your comfort zone

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What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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