Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

what do mexicans enjoy eating? food.

why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

Why did the little boy have a gun pointed at his head? Because he hated his life and wanted to kill himself.

How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

Jacob Edwards has friends

Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

Butt poop.

You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

What happens when you feed a Mini-horse a Happy Meal? If it doesn't die choking on the plastic toy included in the meal, It will most likely develop a terminal case of horse diabetes and suffer through a slow painful dying process.

fruit salad?

Knock, knock. Come in.

whats worse then getting fired from your job? Getting raped by a giant gorilla with a 4 foot long penis following by being bitten by a very poisonous rattle snake and slowly dying a painful death.

A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

Q: What's the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde? A: Whereas intelligent blondes are known to exist, most scientists discount the existence of Bigfoot and consider it to be a combination of folklore, misidentification, and hoax, rather than a living animal, in part because of the large numbers thought necessary to maintain a breeding population.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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