roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So in Jimmy's school if u are misbehaving u are asked to get out of the room. Jimmy was in science, and he was throwing paper a bunch. Then his science teacher says, "Jimmy, do u wanna go out?" Jimmy replies "No thanks, I'm 14 and i have a girlfriend." That's how Jimmy got detention.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

thumb_up thumb_down +3

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the black guy enter the room? He was too large to fit through the doorway therefore he turned around and left

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops