why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

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I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

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Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

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captcha: all yer base

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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I have a gay camel

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People Order Our Patties

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How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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5

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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