Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

What does a snowplow clearing an empty parking lot look like? A horse running freely in a pasture

there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

s

A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

What is worse than reading an anti-joke relatively similar to the other? Walking in your front yard and realizing a zombie is eating your dead grandmother.

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...