How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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What can fly? Lots of things

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What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

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The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? No. You don't need to, it's quite inappropriate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because it's a free country chickens are free to do as they please

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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This anti-joke below is hilarious.

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What do you call the black president? Mr.President

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

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There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

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What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops