what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

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If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

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What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

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Knock knock Get off my porch.

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What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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What is funnier than 24? 25! hahahahahaha!

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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Why was the American patriot sad that Bin-Laden was killed? Because he wanted to take him back to America to touture him.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

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Adam Thomas is homosexual

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Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

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Why wasn't the man talking? Because he was sleeping.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops