Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

thumb_up thumb_down +8

the danced cus they were young, they danced cus they were free, but mostly the danced cus they needed to pee

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why is it so bad that the bus fell off the cliff? All my friends were on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How old are you? 20

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Moralman... Seriously man, take it easy, my name is Nero, yes I play dual identities sometimes, it is only in order to convey my hidden messages to my people. I am deeply sorry to admit that those that assaulted you where indeed from my order, they have been prosecuted by the law and excluded from our order.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops