A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Gentlemen, when she says no, she always means yes. Unless, of course, your rhetoric is of a sexual nature.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats funnier than 24, 69

thumb_up thumb_down -3

These Jokes suck.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why cant you see black people when you are playing hide and seek? Because they are in a very good hiding spot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Nazi say to the farmer? Sie sind Juden versteckt

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

dick in your mouth just kidding haaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did John stay home from school? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops