Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Tell her something that doesn't make any sense at all.

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

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What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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I was watching this movie..... its over now.

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What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

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yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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whats black white and read all over a zebra bleeding to death because a zombie just attacked it and then it attackeed the zombie

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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