F? No k

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's a Guy Gotta Do? -Usher

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Donald Trump.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a man who buys flowers, chocolates, and new jewelry for his wife? A kind, considerate husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar, and he fractures his skull on it. He died in the hospital a few hours later

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops