What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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A Mormon bishop, a Jewish Rabbi, and a Moslem Imam all died on the same day. They went to hell because they thought their good works would save them.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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What do you call a bad anti joke? And anti joke

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Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

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what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

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What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

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Ahem. Testicles. That is all.

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

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What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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What do you call two dog? dogs

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I have down syndrome. -RDV

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what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

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Win industrial estate, Newry

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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