What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You are on a street. there are 4 houses, a red one, a blue one, a green one, and a white one. The red man lives in the red house, the blue man lives in the blue house. the green man lives in the green house. Who lives in the white house? The president

thumb_up thumb_down +13

like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Starving children in africa.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your MUM has aids :D LOL

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An elephant walks in to a dry cleaners and asks the Chinese man behind the counter for the price of cleaning two shirts. The man replies, "$3.00."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the chicken cross the road he didnt he was hit by a van

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the muslim say to the jew. Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +13

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the cow say right before he was slaughtered and later to be sold? Nothing cows dont talk they can create a sound that most people describe as MOO though.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops