How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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My parents died!

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Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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penis haha

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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If 32x=8600, find x. ^ | There it is!

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why did the frog cross the road? because he was attached to the duck

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

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Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

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A women in the kitchen.

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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Q. why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? A. it said concentrate.

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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How do you stop a bus You throw a fridge at it

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A man walks into a bar.

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what did one pedophile say to the other at the playground? DIBZ!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops