Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

thumb_up thumb_down +34

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Together we can get theist likes on anti-jokes :)

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops