Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

WNBA

How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

u jelly?

what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

What do you call a man with no arms? A cripple.

Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

Why couldn't the white child dunk the basketball? His legs were amputated and he has been confined to a wheelchair.

This is not a joke

Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

Fine, Nero7 made sure I got to a safe place at least. My code is "Eliza", that is all, please provide me with whatever information you can regarding what happened, and while I read you are not shy of graphical detail, I ask that you keep it lightly, Nero7 meant much to me, please. -"Veronica.

Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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