There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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What's funnier than 68 69

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

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Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

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Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

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this is not a joke. jks

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

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How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

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Did you hear about Big Chief Running Water? Probably not. Indoor plumbing was invented after Europeans murdered his ancestors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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