why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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redtube

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how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

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what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Why would you call a child douche bag? Cause they're sterile

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Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

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My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

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Why did the fish swim away from the boat when the fishermen put him back in the water? Because he obviously wasn't gonna get back in the boat.

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Q:Why Did the Black people die in there car A: They were Homeless

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"I like my women like I like my coffee, in a cup." -Paul Alangadan

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A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

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A guy walks into a grocery store. He asks a lady where the potatoes are. She says on isle 5 He goes to isle 5, but there are no potatoes.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

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A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

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Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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