two pigs in a bath one says to the other can you pass me the soap..the other replies..do I look like a typewriter!?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happened to the teacher? He taught his students.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

68

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Jim came home from work. only to find out his family had been murdered

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was the man crying? Because he was punched in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

7

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. Your mom is the punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the chicken cross the road It didint make it across

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops