Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -14

We are sorry for being so sorry, and apologize again for apologizing so much... Why wont you just let me apologize? Does this insult you? I apologize. HEY! STOP THAT! I SAID I WAS SORRY SORRY FOR BEING SORRY! FORGIVE ME PLEASE SORRY WHY ARE YOU DRAWING THAT KNIFE OUT OF THE... LISTEN I AM SORRY!!! From my book the boy that cried help too much: The help arrived and the boy was never seen again. TRIPLE POST TO SAY SORRY FOR DOUBLE POSTING! QUADRUPLE POST TO SAY SORRY FOR DOUBLE POSTING...ETC.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I was going to post some witty jokes, but then I realized they weren't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do u kill a mocking bird ? Stab it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are all on a trian. The white guy says "We should all through something off the train that we have too much of in this country." The mexican throws a sombraro of the train and says " We have too many of these in this country." The black guy throws a gun off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country." The white guy pushes the mexican off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

After finishing reading this sentence, read it again and you might or might not realise that there is a secret subliminal message in this sentence making you do something later tonight. Can you spot it?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black, white and red all over? Nothing, I'm colourblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your mama is so ugly. But she is still a respected member of the community

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Anne Frank

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops