What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar, drinks a few beers, then calls a taxi to take him home because he knew the risks of drunk driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How much fun does a gay guy have? A butt load.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Adam Chebali goes to war and is quickly killed. The rest of the world rejoices as he can no longer post anti-jokes only he thinks are funny and brag about himself on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's green, and looks like money? Money...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Nickelback

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? 1 dead baby in 12 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops