what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Nazis did't burn the pizza

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Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

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oh no, i've lost my tractor

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

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Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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holy F**k someone call an ambulance!

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they choose to. this is a free country, where people are free to travel as they please, despite what their sexual orientation may be. Jerk.

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Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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tom pauling

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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