Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

A white guy, a hispanic guy, and asian, a black guy, a philipiean guy, and a wait what am i doing?

What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

there was a blind kid and a man wearing a WWJD & Livstrong bracelet touched his eyes and he could see. He wasn't used to the light and walked into traffic and died instantly.

Kelly Clarkson

Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

TELL

what did meredith and nick have in common an i

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

Why, you might ask, did in fact the chicken cross this all too infamous road? His grandma-ma phoned the righteous bird and requested a visit. Chickens never displease their family.

baby seal walks into a club

A man walks into a bar.....OW!

I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

Santa isn't real

Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...