What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

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It was a warm summer day when justin beiber got hit by the bus everyone was cheering

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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Knock, Knock Come in

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Nothing. He celebrates Kwanzaa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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