Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

colby doesnt shave

How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead why did the dog fall out of the tree? because it was attached to the monkey

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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