A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

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Wy did the chicken?

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

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penis

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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Bob dole

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bees knees

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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What's inside that man's house? Atoms.

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what do you call a black man at a school. coach.

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I was born.

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If you're riding on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a car? Blue. Because Ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops