what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

What did the boy do when he got an F on his English paper? -Laughed.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

i dont like chris

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldnt she get up? She had no legs. Knock Knock. Whos There? Not Suzie

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

whats good about poland... fukk all

A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

Terry Stockton wasn't really hit.

hickory dickory dock no one cares

Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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