Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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A person expresses their opinion online. Another person thanks them for sharing their opinion but kindly disagrees, then he wishes the other person to have a good day.

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Where did the black man sleep? In his house with his wife and children.

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knock knock get lost!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

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roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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hey John will you make some copies

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How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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