What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

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A man sat on a chair

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

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why did the asain hate his life he didn't he was living a good life with large amounts of money with a very hot wife

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

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why is 6 afraid of 7? because 6 is a capitalist and 7 is a communist

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What do you call a man in a wheel chair? Stephen Hawking

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what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

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Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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Women.

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Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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