Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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A man see's a bird and tries to get its attention by whistling at it, much like if it were a dog. The mans whistle fails to get the birds attention because birds have wings and dogs do not.

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A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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What's green,has 4 legs and lives in a tree? A pool table

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Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

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What's worse than 10 babies in one trash can? One baby in 10 trash cans.

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the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

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The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops