Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

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Why did the man walk into the bar? To purchase alcoholic beverages ready for consumption.

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I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

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Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Kefka > Sephiroth

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To return to the roost he had recently escaped.

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Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops