Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

thumb_up thumb_down

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

thumb_up thumb_down

All the other dinosaurs were laughing and teasing the tyrannosaurus because of his tiny arms. They left and the T.rex was sobbing uncontrollably next to a giant fern. "What's the matter little fellow?" said Jesus. The crying dinosaur looked down and said "I That's the end of my stupid puppet show, cuz I couldn't think of anything a blubbering dinosaur would say to our Lord and saviour.

thumb_up thumb_down

Here is an opposite. Black Santa Claus.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down

How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the homeless man buy a mansion? he didn't. i lied. he would need a job to be able to buy a mansion.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why are all blondes dumb? They are not all dumb but constant bullying just saying blondes are just pretty gives them that illogical stereo type

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You cant like my stuff ive known you for like 1 day. just kidding you can like whatever you want, actually ive know you for 5 years

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wanna hear a joke? Justin bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is black, white and red all over? A black man has been shot and a white paramedic is standing over him trying to save his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

hi will

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops