Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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A black teenage girl wants to get a job, unfortunately she is chained to a fence, beaten, and called a dog.

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I just can't stand sitting down!

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

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What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

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I STUCK MY TESTICLE IN A BLENDER!!!

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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Why did the black man have lots of money. He studied hard at school and got into a good university. He dedicated 5 years of his life working relentlessly and getting his diploma in medicine then went on to work in a private hospital as head doctor and neuro surgeon. He was very successful in his specific field of medicine. That didn't work out so after quitting his job and realizing he had wasted over 7 years of his life achieving nothing but lose of interest in his career. He then bought a lottery ticket and won 8 million dollars.

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What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops