What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when the elephants were coming? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when the elephants were coming? Here come the plums! (She was color blind.)

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

I would rape her

What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

What is worse than Justin Bieber? Well, 1. Deforestation 2. Hurricanes 3. Diabetes 4. Mass Murder ....and probably much more.

what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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