What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, killed 6's family and made him watch...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What was the pirate's favorite letter W

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are you angry dude? I can't see my forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops