how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped his mother

What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

Have you heard the joke about the Swedish surgeon who found a frog in his patient's stomach? Yes, you've told me it before.

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

A guy walks into a bar what does he say? OW.

Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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