Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

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whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Lets go Yankees

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Why did the...uhh.... Lamp.

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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Two gorillas walked into a bar and it hurt

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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There's a pile of dead babies with one live baby on the bottem eating it's way out.

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What's 9+10? 19

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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One watermelon said the the other watermelon, "you are looking mighty plump today", the other watermelon didn't say anything because watermelons cant talk

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Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

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I was bitter, nonetheleast because you and I became friends, while someone working for you (at that time it might just as well had been you) was conducting a lot of illegal activities. I kept thinking, why does the guy call himself "the wizard", its the most used name... Why? Because it is the most used name, good luck finding "THE WIZARD" among internet nerds, but then again, if you search for the most famous one, you find "THE MAN", Not only did you tell me at first that you where Nero. Which I can prove you are not, but you know, one side of me was your friend, the other knew I would have to get rid of you no matter the cost, if you kept your activities. SImply put: When I enjoyed our time together, I pushed you away with stupid humor, small insults and etc, mostly in order to protect myself from getting to close with a potential threat for well, security, lets keep it at that.

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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Where does the girl with one leg work? Ihop

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

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OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

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you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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