why was the guy stranded on an island? because his boat crashed.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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I walked into my maths lesson and my teacher told me to point out the uncommon variable. ..So i pointed at the ginger black man in the corner.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I am.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

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Dad what does negligence mean? SHUT THE FUCK UP KID! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN!

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

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You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

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Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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How do you talk to a mentally challenged person? You use words in a sequential order that would make sense grammatically

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops