A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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who likes fried chicken? almost everyone because fried chicken is delicious

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? On a fundamental level, it was pursuing evolutionary instincts, perhaps a half-bored interest in food.

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What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

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Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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What's green,has 4 legs and lives in a tree? A pool table

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Why did the mushroom get invited to the party? He is a fun-gi!!

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Why are you reading this joke? There is this nice 'Bad Idea T-Shirts' ad right there.

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

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why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It was a tragedy.

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops