What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

The Game.

Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. They proceed to have an in-depth conversation about interfaith dialogue and no one questions the imam orders of non-alcoholic beverages.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

A man walks into a bar and starts telling anti-jokes to his friend. His friend is a follower and laughs even though they aren't funny.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

Where do black people ride bicycles? In the Pedestrian Zone.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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