do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Kelly Clarkson

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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a fat man walks into a bar and gets laughed at because his shoes are untied

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

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Whats not green and cant pee? Not a pea!

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How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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