Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The bartender is institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

whats 2+2? 4

A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

7

How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

Whats horny and big A dick minus the big part!

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

"Free to play" Play free "right now"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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