A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

What did Hitler say to the lady right next to him before the both committed suicide? I don't know, I don't understand German. I also wasn't there.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

What Happened to the man with no arms? Nothing, he continued his life with his daily routine of using his feet to accomplish his goals that day.

Guess what? What? Idk. I just wanted to make u excited.

Woman.

What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

Republicans

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Q: What do you call a black man in space? A: An astronaut. -Ap

justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

Anthony Dephillips is handsome

Why did the chicken go up the car? To get a drink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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