Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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Why did the koala bear fall outta the tree? He died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?? He was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?? He had no arms. Why did the fourth koala fall out of the tree?? He thought it was a race to the bottom. Why did the fifth koala fall out of the tree?? Peer Pressure.

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is.

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OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one is quite sure because technology is not advanced enough for humans to converse with chickens.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

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U ALL LIAK DIK

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What did the man without a tongue say...

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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