Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

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heat!

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A white man and a black man play a game of basketball, who wins? It depends who's better

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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9/11

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What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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Jamie stegman put many doodles into his mouth, sometimes 2,3 even 5.

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shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

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Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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k

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Your mama's so fat she can't have children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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