Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

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friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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Betty Whites ALIVE?

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A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

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What did the fish say? Moo

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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my mom raped yerr foot

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

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Want to hear a dead baby joke? Abortion

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head engage in a discussion on World politics. The brunette says she would like to see politicians paying more attention to the environment. The red head says she would like to see improvements in the economy. The blonde says she has to poop.

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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