How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

How do you make a builder sad? You shit on his bricks.

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

Agricultural production fell significantly.

Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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