what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

baby loves lalma

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

Nobody cares.

What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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