What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide, Get over it

why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

Ham sandwich

Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

Boobs are nasty!

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

math test 2=2

dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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