Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

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dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

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You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they were both killed in a building collapse.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

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What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

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Chuck Norris died.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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