What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Im taking a shit right now.

A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

steven hawking walks into a bar

Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

I'm homeless.

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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